The Truth is Never Hidden

Dear friends,

A few years ago, I really liked this guy and for about a year I was talking to him. It turned out the whole time he had a girlfriend. Naturally, I was upset when I found out. I did not even find out from him, and when he mentioned it, it was so casual as though the year that had gone past hadn’t happened. I think he was even asking for relationship advice. So on top of that it felt like he had no regard for my feelings. It was a bit jarring because he’d always acted as though he cared - and I believed that. To be clear, he knew I liked him - I told him so - and he never once said - “ah well, thats a bit awks because I have a girlfriend.”

I hold on to things a lot, and ruminate over them for a long time. This is not necessarily a good thing, but I am slowly learning to let go more quickly by using the time my mind goes back, to remind myself that I have to take responsibility for the things that happen in my life. This case was no different. 

The truth is that I may not have categorically known that he had a girlfriend, but it was clear that he was unavailable on many levels. All I did was complain about it and continue to magnify all the good qualities I decided made my constant dissatisfaction worth it. I have no one to blame for that but myself. I cannot take responsibility for his decision to delay sharing that information with me, or even the way in which he shared it. But there are still many things I did that caused some of the hurt I ended up experiencing.

The truth was clear: This person is not for you.

Truth told me this when he took days to respond to my messages.

I replied that when he finally replied we had good conversations.

Truth told me this when he’d disappear every weekend and be back saying hello on Monday.

I replied that he’s just spending time away from his phone.

Truth told me this when he literally said that he is not in a place to be in a committed relationship

I replied that he just needs time to see how great I am.

Truth told me this when I constantly felt like I was trying to prove myself to him

I replied that sometimes, these things happen and it takes time.

So Truth came to me, and I continued fabricating lies to shut it out. Or simply closed my eyes and ears to it. Until finally it sent an earthquake that no lie could cover, but by then some damage had already been done. 

Truth wants the best for you. It wants you operating at your highest self, and around those who help to bring out that self. Something might seem nice, but don’t ignore truth when she removes the mask and reveals the thing’s true nature. 

Trust the truth.

I know sometimes it is hard to imagine better for ourselves, especially with fear supplying us with all the lies, saying, "I am fine this way, it is only a little bit unpleasant. I can handle the discomfort", but trust the truth.

And when you are finally able to acknowledge the truth, learn the lessons that come with it. Take responsibility, and know that you deserve the best and not a slither less. 

Love,

OFP

Feel free to share the images above.