I Know What I Want … What Next?

Dear Friends,

How are you doing ?

I am doing very well thank you, in case you were also wondering. After my realisation last week that I have lots with which to occupy my time, I sort of froze. Am I deceiving myself ? Should I be doing something else instead ? I also had many visits from the ubiquitous doubt that tends to rear its face anytime we decide to go along with our highest desires. Today, I’d like to talk about how I am trying to approach going ahead in the direction of my desires anyway.

THE GOLDEN RULE

The first thing, which I am most guilty of not following, is - keep it to yourself. Whatever you want to do, nurse it like a little seed in your mind and water it everyday. If you notice, once a seed is planted it is hidden in the soil. There are things going on in it and roots starting to form. But these things are all hidden. If you take that seed out of the soil, it won’t grow. So perhaps don’t see it as hiding, see it as giving your desire the right space and environment to grow enough before it is ready to reveal itself to others. Yes, you might need to ask people for some things along the way, but as much as possible, you should keep your desire to yourself. You can ask for help without baring the entirety of your soul.

Keeping it to yourself maintains that steady energy within you. When we get excited about something, we tend to dissipate the energy quickly by telling people. Some people will be encouraging, but many will not even be able to match your energy- because it’s not their dream. It’s yours! It is still discouraging to share this grand thing that excites you, only to meet a flat/ distracted response. So maintain that energy and direct it towards the steps you need to take. Water your seed.

Apart from letting it grow, you save yourself the guilt and embarrassment of telling people all these grand plans, but not following through. You feel no pressure to move fast or prove yourself, because you have nothing to prove to anyone - they don’t know about it. So you can steadily make daily progress, and keep the energy and momentum consistent.

There will come a time where you don’t even need to tell, your seed will erupt from the soil on its own. Let it speak for itself. Just keep directing your energy towards nurturing it.

START WHERE YOU ARE

As you nurture this seed, you have to water it. Take the time to see what it will need and what you can give it in this moment. Start where you are. Perhaps a seed just needs some water everyday. You don’t need to start thinking about tractors or combine harvesters. Not yet. Start where you are and water the seed. As it grows and its needs change, you will adjust, and also because you’ve now gathered time and experience with this seed, you will be better placed to provide it with what it needs to keep growing. But don’t stop nurturing it. This is very important. At the end of every day you should be saying: I did ___ towards ensuring the growth of my seed today. Tomorrow I would like to do ____. But don’t let the future distract you, start where you are.

BE PATIENT OOOOO

Watch out for impatience. Just as we like to skip the simple or seemingly boring step of watering everyday, in favour of planning for combine harvesters and big machinery, we tend to get impatient. We say to ourselves, I have been watering this thing everyday, nothing is happening. We get discouraged by rejections or even if we get stuck in the middle of a thought process or plan and we conclude because of the little stone in our way, that we can’t go any further. Don’t be impatient, meaning, don’t think you can skip steps. You can’t. And if someone else looks like they have, know that somewhere somehow they have put in the work, you just can’t see it. And if they have not put in the work, then whatever quick headway they seem to have made, is surely not going to be sustainable. It’s a simple law of nature. No one goes against that, not even God. So, be patient - don’t get tired of putting in the work.

I’M DOING THIS BECAUSE ...

Remind yourself why what you are doing is important to you. Write something down that will remind you whenever you forget or feel like this is all pointless. Let the paragraph, audio note or even short video, be a message you constantly use to remind yourself - why. It can be that it is what makes you feel alive. It can be that it is the only thing you feel aligned with. It can be that you can feel, to your very core, this is what I need to be doing, whatever the reason is, or message of reminder is, record it somehow and look at it frequently. Because we always forget or we get into robotic mode and things seem pointless. But they are not.

PROTECT YOUR DESIRES

Watch out for those who want to make you feel ridiculous. You will know constructive criticism when you get it. It will make you want to do more and excited to do better. Anything else will just make you feel bad. Distance yourself from such people as much as possible. You don’t need them. You’re probably already unsure of yourself to some extent, don’t let others add to that uncertainty. Protect yourself as you would protect and defend a child from a nasty teacher who just has it out for the child.

FUN FUN FUN !!!

Finally, have fun and enjoy the process. Life isn’t supposed to be enjoyable when or if. It is supposed to be enjoyable now. Part of not holding ourselves back is allowing ourselves to enjoy the journey. As we are watering our plant, we can sing to it. Tell it silly jokes. Dance in front of it. Whatever, but let’s enjoy the process of becoming ourselves. Discouragement will come. Questions will abound. Doubt will pay its weekly visit. Expect those things, and know that they are just part of the ebb and flow. The journey isn’t just a straight line or a flat terrain. It’s up and down and left and right, but, more importantly, it moves forward, if you let it. So, enjoy the walk. Stop and marvel at everything around you. Acknowledge every tiny footstep forward, just as you would a baby that’s learning to walk. No movement is too small. Just keep moving.

So let’s get going! I am saying this to myself as much as I am saying this to you. We are all part of this journey together.

And we can do it !!!!!!

Yay!

Love,

O.F.P

29.9.19